The Enlightened Mom

I’ve had some pretty weird “snake” experiences this week. We live in a neighborhood in northwest Florida that used to be a tree farm. We not only have tons of trees and marshes around us, but also because of this environment, we have lots of critters. Many of them the slithery kind.

The back of my house faces our pool and around the pool is an iron fence. I glanced out the other day to notice a little lizard scampering along the top of the fence. I turned away then looked back and thought I saw it playing in the sago palm, which sits in the corner of the fence. But when I looked a little closer, I realized this wasn’t the lizard. It was a snake! And it was not only crawling around the palm, but eventually made its way upon the fence and was slithering along the top of it!

All I could think was, “Oh my gosh! What if I were laying in the lawn chair right there sunbathing and looked up to see the underbelly of that snake? I would have a heart attack!”

I just returned from a week’s vacation to the Big Apple with my oldest daughter Mackenzie. She is a bright, compassionate and beautiful 20-year-old woman. And she is terrified of flying.

Kenzie hasn’t wanted to look from where this fear of flying stems. Although, we’re both pretty sure it began in an instant when she was seven. Her dad had taken her and her little sis to a local town fair. I wasn’t with them, but from the stories that the three shared, what happened while there was a pretty harrowing experience.

At that time, Kenzie was a climber and a little bit of an adventurer. She loved traveling and flying. So when seeing a bungee ride at the fair, she had to do it. From what I understand, Mackenzie climbed up onto a big trampoline and had a harness put around her waist. A bungee cord was hooked to each side of the harness. I’m sure you’ve seen this kind of ride at festivals or fairs. The kids love them! Usually an attendant will pull on the child’s feet and suddenly they go flying into the air. They come down and touch the trampoline and go up again. And that’s exactly what Kenzie did…until one of the bungees snapped.

Today is my third wedding anniversary to Charlie. Over the last three years we’ve not just blended our families, but have created a loving, accepting and cohesive home. Plus, we’ve built a company, spending time together 24/7, launched my book, dealt with three teenaged girls and their high school drama and failed romances, and have all worked through deep emotional issues from the death of our children’s parents. My late hubby died from a heart attack and Charlie’s wife committed suicide. But in spite of it all, my marriage is the best I could have ever imagined.

People warned me that I was rushing into my relationship with Charlie. We started dating just months after my late husband passed four-and-a-half years ago. But my heart told me different. I felt an intense connection to this man. Others told me that the passion and romance would soon wear off. I knew from past experience that they could possibly be right. But I knew I had to trust my heart.

Charlie and I have a relationship that is magical! I have never laughed so hard in my life. And when we touch each other, we both feel tingles down our spines.

I often hear people say to me, “I want a relationship just like yours and Charlie’s.” They see the laughter and playfulness we share, but most importantly, they see our heart connection. Our intimacy and deep commitment to one another is evident to anyone who spends time with us.

So on this special day of our wedding anniversary, I would like to share a gift with you. Here are the five steps we’ve used to create a loving, joyous, and truly intimate relationship.